Five Revelations I Had During a Palm Reading

A few weeks ago, I caught wind that one of my co-workers reads palms and natal charts. Immediately fascinated, I wanted in. I always wanted the opportunity to go to a palm reading; the idea that your life is outlined in palm is something that always held a lot of interest to me. Yes, I know there are a lot of naysayers out there. Those who do not believe in it because there’s no “proof”. That could be true, but there’s also no proof that there’s a God, and yet we believe in that too.

(I’m getting a little defensive, can you tell?)

The fact of the matter is, to a lot of people who read palms or natal charts, it’s science. The answers are outlined right there,  it just requires someone to analyze it. To think that when you were born, all the different elements of the universe had an impact on you in that moment, is pretty incredible.

Erin was initially a little nervous to give me a reading. She’s found that there have been occasions where she tells someone something that they don’t want to hear. It’s a deeply personal moment, and quite intimate. I didn’t push, (just gentle reminders every so often… which, isn’t pushy for me…) and finally, one night after a glass of wine she just jumped right into it.

There was a lot that she revealed that she wouldn’t know about me. Erin knows me as her Manager, her coworker, and the person who decorates the restaurant. She doesn’t know me like my friends do. She doesn’t know about this blog, she doesn’t know my personal struggles with my career, and she most certainly doesn’t know much about my personal life. So, when she picked up my palm and started saying things that I’ve always felt or known, I immediately became a believer.

Here are Five Revelations I had During my Readings:

  1. I Have Two Destinies That Will Always Conflict

To quote the reading “when you were born there was never a clear path outlined for you. Your parents didn’t say you were going to be a lawyer or a doctor, but instead, they allowed you to formulate as you grew”. I asked my mom about this and she said “Yes, we never really put you on a path. You were always someone who wanted to do their own thing anyway.”

This one hit me particularly hard because for a long time I always felt like I was a hamster on a wheel going nowhere. I always felt misplaced in the world, and, there were moments… still are moments, actually… that I wondered why finding my path was so much harder for me. More than that, I always felt… still feel, actually… conflicted in following my passion, or doing something more traditional. As Erin saw it, I know what my two destinies are now, and I will always struggle balancing the two. She’s 100% correct. However, being given that insight assuages the anxiety about never feeling exactly “right”.

2. My Venus is an Aquarius
While I was born on March 8th, making me a “Pisces”, your natal chart reveals more about all of the planets and their alignment when you were born. Venus, in particular, represents your “Love”.  For me, my “Love” is most closely represented by Aquarius. I’m actually going to quote the entire reading on this one because it’s so perfectly accurate that it scares me:

Your love life takes you on adventures. You don’t go for conventional choices, you’re just drawn to things. It’s in the fourth house, which is in the house of cancer, so you’re very protective. You have a shell around you and when people mean something to you, you sort of extend that shell around them. But, you do it in the way of an Aquarius where people don’t realize it.

Aquarius and Cancer are a very weird combination. It’s sort of funny because cancer is this water  sign,  smart, intuitive, sensitive, and protective and is almost abrasive. Aquarius is this sign where you never know what they’re thinking. And, that’s your love life. Its all over the place, and no one ever knows what you’re truly thinking, but to you, its what you’re clinging to. It’s what you want to build your shell around and you’re very abrasive about it, in the sense that once you find that person, to you it’s “this is how it is, and this is who I’m building my shell around”.

I’ve always been one that doesn’t allow people in very easily unless I see a trait worthwhile, (it sounds precocious but in reality it’s just a way of insuring that I don’t get hurt) but, when I do let someone in, it’s very… well, intense and abrasive like she said. Even in friendships, I build a shell around people who positively impact my life, and I’m certainly learning the balance of that shell. Or, at least I’m trying to.

3. I have a Solid Love Line…  and, it formed around the time I met Mark

When Erin saw this line her reaction was so genuine. To quote: “your love line is strong and singular. You’re going to have a long love with one person and it looks like it formed a few years ago. Not everyone has this. Look, I don’t“, and she showed me her palm. I thought this was sweet, and I loved the romance of it. Sorry babe, you’re stuck with me.

4. I have Three Additional Loves… but, two are  coming later in life…

You can stop asking when I’m having children because according to this chart, not until my thirties. There’s definitely two very strong lines, and one little straggler. She said this could also be animals, so, we know one line is definitely Emmett.

5. I Exhibit a lot of Capricorn Traits

My Sun and Mercury are Pisces. My Moon is Leo, My Venus is Aquarius and my Ascendant (who I appear to be to others) is Libra. But, even though I’m all over the place, most of my signs lie in Capricorn, or the house of Capricorn. To quote:

For you, all of your planets, and your moon, are in either a house of Capricorn, or are in Capricorn, so you’re almost a Capricorn. You have such strong underlying Capricorn traits. You act like a Capricorn. It’s the oldest of the earth signs, so you’re going to be very, very grounded, occasionally level headed, and they have a strong sense of everyone around them. You’re watching other people, especially with your Pisces. So, youre a spectator where youre taking people into your life, watching them, and learning from them, but they don’t even know it. People don’t realize their impact on you. You build with them and around them, because you love surrounding yourself with people who will better you. You come from this very old sense of security and you know where that place is.

You’re chart is all centered on the bottom, which means you’re much more introverted than people think. Everything is hiding on the bottom, except your emotions. Those are at the top, and you cannot hide your emotions and that’s because they’re in Leo.

To me, this part was most humbling and most revealing. It’s always assumed that I’m an extrovert because of my ability to reveal my feelings (so Leo of me) and my love of being around people. Even on Myers Briggs, I always come up with ENTJ, but, that’s because those tests are mostly based on feelings. However, my favorite part is the part where she says I’m learning from people and they don’t even know it.

It’s my favorite because when she started, I didn’t see this nervous girl who desperately didn’t want to get fired. I saw someone with heart, passion, an ability to learn quickly and a drive to work hard. I watched her for weeks, and, eventually, when I realized she wasn’t going to leave if it got too hard, I started to train her. I taught her tricks that would make her life easier, and I worked with her to refine her skills. While I taught her, she was teaching me. Her love of art and reading sparked my interest again.  Maybe it’s because she’s fresh out of college so the world hasn’t jaded her perspective yet, but, having a conversation with her teaches me so much. Hell, just look at this blog post.

If my resolution for 2017 is to live life with more intention, this reading certainly helps give me much more perspective.

(Leanne Note: I directly transcribed her words from a recording so the quotes are very raw and conversational. Additionally, we all know I use commas when I pause… while I’m trying to get better at not misplacing my commas… I sort of feel like it adds to my unique voice. So, don’t judge it.)

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The Soul is a Puzzle- An Introduction

For a few weeks now, I have been working on this new thought process I sort of stumbled upon. While I’ve spent most of my morning transcribing and dissecting my amazing Palm and Natal Chart reading last night (seriously, I love when you meet someone with immense talent), I sort of felt like today was a good day to introduce this “theory” (I use that term lightly. Very lightly)

Today’s post is going to be a simple introduction to this new thought process. Laying down the foundation, if you will. In my hope of living a more intentional life, having weekly posts like this certainly inspire me to keep going.

Enjoy.

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The Soul is  a Puzzle

 

You walk through the mall one day and see a beautiful picture in the window of a store.Upon closer inspection, you see that this beautiful imagery is actually a puzzle that was glued together. On a whim, you decide to buy this two thousand piece puzzle in hopes that you too can have that piece of art in your home. Like a child with a new toy, you arrive home anxious to put together this new puzzle. You pour a glass of wine (or, if you’re like me, baileys on the rocks), get comfortable and begin to open the puzzle. You empty the contents of the box and stare at the image, look back at the pile of pieces askew on your table or living room floor, look back at the final product and wonder if this was the best idea.

Inhale, exhale. You start organizing the pieces of the puzzle and as you move each piece into different piles, you begin to notice that certain pieces are beginning to come together. It takes time, but the more you become familiar with each piece, the easier it is to fill in the gaps to this puzzle that once seemed overwhelming. Slowly but surely, the puzzle begins to take shape.

Look back at that final product on the box one last time. However, this time, imagine the final image is a picture of you. All of those little pieces that were once stacked in an overwhelming pile were the pieces that create “you”. Not just “you” as an employee, “you” as a spouse, or “You” as a friend; no, the whole you. The pieces you don’t share with everyone, but the ones you know are there.

Each piece that once laid in a pile were labeled. Names of people who mean a lot to you, activities you enjoy, personality traits, your guilty pleasures, favorite food. Your memories described, the people you’ve lost, and the people you treasure.

Imagine looking at your life as a puzzle.

Yes, the puzzle as a whole is important. After all, the attraction of the aesthetic is what led you to purchase it. But, isn’t the journey to putting together the puzzle the attraction of it? Finding the correct pieces, working through frustration to fit each piece meticulously together. There’s satisfaction in finding answers, or solutions. There’s completeness that comes when you can work to put something together. It’s the challenge that attracts us to the puzzle, right?

While puzzles initially seem sturdy, it’s a known fact that puzzle pieces can fray, pieces can disconnect, and as any hobbyist will tell you, nothing is more tedious than attempting to frame the completed puzzle. When putting together a puzzle, it’s important to take care of each piece. Because, if they fray or become damaged, they might not fit seamlessly.

If our soul is a puzzle, it’s the journey of piecing it together that makes life so fulfilled.

This piece, or, continuing thought process, explores the idea of how our soul and life comes together in little fragments, and how we have to enjoy each moment of it.

Next Week: The Heart as the Center of the Puzzle.

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Happy weekend. Let me know your feedback

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On Working Opposite of Everyone Else

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I lead an interesting, sort of abnormal, lifestyle for a twenty something.(ugh, Leanne- stop saying “twenty something”. You’re 26. You’re going to be 27 soon. Live your truth and stop trying to mask it, you fool.) As you can tell, I’m maybe not doing so well with the word “27”. ((Fine, I’m not doing well with it, at all. Peter Pan syndrome is in full effect to the point where I’ve removed my birthday from all social media))

If you watch “Vanderpump Rules” obsessively like I do, then you might remember a conversation that happened between the girls on last night’s episode. Katie and Kristen, or maybe it was Stassi too, (fine, maybe I don’t pay attention as obsessively as I should. DON’T JUDGE ME)  wondered if they should have taken a more traditional route in terms of working. There they were, surrounded by all these “hustle and bustle” NYC types of people, and it made them insecure. Of course, leave it Scheana to add a little perspective to the whole thing: ” I could never imagine myself working a 9-5 job.”

Take that conversation, and imagine it happening internally at least 3 times a months.

When I first graduated college, I worked traditional jobs. I really tried to follow the path that was laid out for me. I did, I swear I did. However, working a monotonous  9-5 job where my work didn’t have a direct impact really drained me. Plus, I never felt appreciated and always felt like I wasn’t being taken seriously. (Seriously, how millennial do I sound right now though?) I wanted to work in event planning, but couldn’t get a job in an event planning because I needed experience, but I couldn’t get experience. So, I buried that dream and focused on attempting to find happiness in a role I knew I wasn’t meant for.

When I moved home, I was offered a job by my Dad (you have no idea how much I hate saying that.) just to make some money while I “figured out my next step.”  Within four months of working as just a server, I made enough money to pay off $10,000 worth of debt. There was something very motivating to me about seeing a direct result of my hard work. If I was off my game, my tips reflected it. And, the best part of it was the hours. I was able to write, submit articles, and just be very carefree while also supporting myself.

A year into it, I was gaining A LOT of writing momentum when I was offered the Catering Manager Position. Remember that dream I buried? Well, this felt like the right thing to do. At first, I failed epically. I was trying to do everything the way the old manager had done it, and while he was a very organized worker, you can’t fit a square with a circle, no matter how hard you try. In January, I took more control, did the work my way, and saw a lot of results from it. Remember that motivation I felt for seeing a direct result of my work? Imagine that motivation, tripled.

I’ve been very fortunate in that most of the people in my life understand my abnormal hours. I don’t work 9-5.  That’s not to say I sleep in most days, because if you follow me on snapchat (@leannejustcant) you know that I’m awake and in the park with Emmett by 8:05 a.m. each morning. But, what it does mean is that I can’t “go out on a Saturday”, because I’m working. And, what it does mean, is that sometimes, when I’m around people (aka, everyone else in my life) who do work traditional jobs, I can get insecure.

Thoughts like “am I failure?” or “should I just quit this and find something more… normal” creep through my head. Most times, I’m able to refocus and remember that “Events” is what I wanted to do. I am able to look at my calendar, and look at all my “Thank you so much!” e-mails and remember why I do this.(side note, if you’re having an event- be sure to thank your vendors. Seriously, a simple thank you saves lives) Because, I’m damn good at it and have a goal for this business. However, there are times when I can’t refocus my thoughts. Where I do feel like a failure. Where I feel like Katie and Stassi surrounded by a bunch of NYC hustle and bustle types.

After a few days of self loathing, I remember what it felt like working “traditional jobs”. I remember that I am in control of my life, and I remember the feeling I felt when I paid off the last of my debt. I remind myself that I’m still “young” in most peoples eyes (just not my own), I remind myself that if I use my off time properly (aka, not binge watching Vanderpump Rules) I can have that balance of doing both. In a few days, I feel more like Scheana embracing her life, and all is right again in the world.

If we all worked the traditional jobs, who would plan the events?

 Mantra: focus on your passion, not someone elses. 

 

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